Taking Stock of 2022: Spiritual Blackout

November 11, 2022

Figure 1 Pai Lamun Valley Resort, Northern Thailand

While the rest went off on a day tour in the mountains of Pai, I enjoy me-time with the Lord. We are on our annual year-end retreat, to take stock of the year and to wait on Him for guidance for the next. 

“What has this year been like? “ I pondered as I settled myself into this beautiful tent in a mountain resort in Northern Thailand, hungry for God’s Presence. 

This Year of Supernatural has gone by so fast, that I cannot really grasp it. I was just coping, on auto-pilot, with barely any mental bandwidth to think about anything else, as I confronted and grappled with wave after wave of needs and challenges within and without. 

Ah, it was like a lesson you have taught me years ago - the pilot flying his small plane in a great storm - can’t see anything outside, can’t get help, can’t help others. He is on his own out there. He can only rely on well tested flight instruments that he was well trained for and knows so well, trusting them to get the plane through safely. 

He holds firmly to the controls amidst the heavy pounding and shaking. His eyes fixed ahead even when he cannot see beyond, while he shuts out the deafening noise and frightening bolts of lightning out there.

Then two words popped up.


Indeed, this year has been so dark, so dark spiritually. Never felt so dark and so disconnected from my soul and from the Lord at times even. Darker than all the years put together. 

Maybe I am just getting old.

V reminded me of what he said to me a few days ago when we flew from Singapore to Thailand. 

I reached for my journal. 

Figure 2 Extracted from my journal

Our Little Great Defenders

Shortly after we took off, I put on my eye mask as usual and worshipped God with music plugged into my ears. 

Then, I started to see a horde of angels led by the Lord to escort us safely out of our country. Ah, our great defenders have come.. 

Later, Joanna shared that she had a huge headache just after we took off. It got worse until she could hardly breathe at one point. And then shortly after, it was over and everything was good again in the plane.

These little defenders were very much like the thousands of little angels I had seen in 2019/2020 while we were praying for China against the Wuhan virus. 

I prayed for the Lord to heal my mind and my brains and for the mental health of our nation. I sensed that minds are under a great assault, so strong is the battle against our minds that even godly and powerful men and women are crumbling under it. 

I thanked God for taking us away on this trip, all 16 of us, even though it is not an easy journey.

I saw the angels gather up all the sludge and filth from our land as our plane flew higher and further away, and they then dumped it all into the sea beneath. 

I was overjoyed. Relieved,

Now we can start our retreat, out of the darkness, out of this “storm”.

To rest in You.

To hear your Voice.

To take stock of this year.

To wait upon you for your Word and guidance for 2023.

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